I could just tell myself to screw this and not give a damn about my mother. I am extremely pissed that I have my life dictated to me by the whims of a schizophrenic mother. I didn't ask for this life and I don't want to deal with this.
Here I am as well, impressing HODs and managers in my company who are giving me career advice about how to advance myself, and how being patient and building my reputation in this career would trail blaze the future that I have. I dream of success and the very things that I love are holding me back. This sort of dilemma is not for the average 23 year old to deal with. I wish those punks that live for I-phones and shit could have this life and see whether they survive this shit.
GOD!!!! I didn't ask for this...........I WANT to advance myself. I WANT a career and yet the needs of my family are pulling me back. And I am at this cross road......wondering if I should quit my job in to accommodate the needs of my defunct family. I really love the company that I currently work for..........and I am not sure what I would be trading myself for if I were to quit or transfer to another department. Here a path of possible enlightenment/ destruction that stands before me..........A path where "everything burns and everyone screams"(pardon the song reference by Ben Moody and Anastasia) or a path where Frodo manages to throw the ring into Mount Doom and everything is dandy again.
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